OMFG, that was one hilarious episode.....
First, I loved the theme. Enough like the original but very distinct. Anyone know the band? Sounded familiar for some reason....
This episode is going to be impossible to do in my normal character driven format, so I'll switch to a more linear format as a result.
We start with Brooke in the bathroom looking majorly confused and then finding Sylvia in the tub. This is followed by a sentence letting us know that we are going back 12 hours and then we have a shot of a shirtless Julian. NICE!
<fanning self> Ok, I'm back. We find out that he and Brooke have been naughty 2 and a half times (dare I ask which one of them constitutes that half?) (And, can I just say stamina? Ok, 'nuff said :-) ) Julian goes to his bachelor party and Brooke to her bachelorette party.
Then we move to Haley and Nathan. Nathan is studying and is trying to figure out what his @$$hat of a professor said to him. Haley convinces him to stop thinking about it and just study. Then she leaves.
We move to seeing Haley, Brooke, and Quinn going to a spa. When they are almost there, Haley lets it drop that Alex and Millie are waiting for them there. Brooke is upset that Alex is there, but is placated when she finds out that Alex got the spa suite. Then we move to seeing the girls getting massages and drinking some sort of green homeopathic drink. I hafta say that it looked like some shacknasty drink. Ewww......
Someone (I think it was Alex), gives Brooke a bag which is filled with interesting goodies and the girls decide to go out for fun while Haley (who refused the drink) goes home.
Then, we go to the suite the next morning to see the girls all asleep in various places. Haley comes in with coffee and doughnuts and wakes people up. We are treated to some interesting facts including that Millie got a pair of boots stamped above her ass (love that Quinn called it a "ho tag", never heard that one before), Quinn got her tongue pierced, and Alex has a nice black eye. Oh yeah, and Brooke lost her engagement ring and is wearing one of the largest and tackiest toy diamond rings on her finger. And then there was the skateboarding dog. Loved that. And the call from Julian to Brooke which was intercepted by Sylvia. That was a slightly disturbing, but absolutely hilarious scene where Julian started the conversation with some naughty talk while apparently naked in
bed and ready to be naughty with himself. <fanning self again> I'm sorry I have to say it, I think he meant "Brookeing" himself.....
So, now we start the investigation into what exactly happened the night before.
Now I will go out of sequence in the show and go in chronological order. At least to the best of my ability given what we saw.
At some point, someone called Sylvia and she joined the girls at a bar. At this bar, Sylvia got in a wing eating contest and won, Millie drank a cocktail made out of 15 liquors that was served in a cowboy boot, and Brooke called Julian, made out with him, and he took the ring to hold onto it (an event which caused Brooke to spend the entire next day looking for it). The girls then left the bar and somehow got their hands on an ice cream truck as well as Dave Navarro. So curious as to how the hell that happened, but anyways......
At some point they went to Professor Kellerman's house, TPed it, and stole his dog (the aforementioned skateboarding dog) while Quinn accidentally nailed Alex in the eye with her elbow. The fact that he named his dog Dogest is cause for my head sinking into my hands at the horribly bad joke (seeing that Kellerman's first name is August). They also went to a bar with a bull that they all rode and that Alex fell off of. Then once they picked up Dave Navarro they went to Clothes Over Bros where they girls proceeded to go through a whole box of condoms. And before your minds goes into the gutter <too late I says>, know that they used them as water balloons where Dave Navarro hit Alex in the eye and gave her the black eye. The girls left and locked Dave Navarro in the shop
therefore causing his band's shows to be cancelled. At some point before leaving the store, Brooke and Sylvia exchange harsh words with Sylvia getting in a particularly low blow about Brooke's infertility.
Nathan returns the dog and tweaks Kellerman's nose. Julian takes Brooke to the church where she discovers that he spent last night getting the church ready with Haley and some help from Sylvia. Brooke and Sylvia make up and Brooke asks Haley to be her maid of honor. Finally, Alex and Quinn bond while cleaning the suite.
This was so not a character driven episode, but rather a series of comedic episode and loads of fun. I did like that Alex and Quinn are bonding and that Brooke and Sylvia are setting aside their enmity for Julian's sake.
Next week, the wedding. And someone gets randy in the limo......
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